In Chapter 2 of Alcoholics Anonymous titled "There Is A Solution" it is stated, "These observations would be academic and pointless if our friend never took the first drink, thereby setting the terrible cycle in motion. Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body." So, although it is true that an alcoholic has a physical allergy it is the mental obsession which is of the utmost importance - a mental obsession that does not limit itself to alcohol.Alcoholism is a unique disease in that it is two-fold (as are most addictions in their nature). We have a physical allergy which ensures us that each and every time we put alcohol or substances of any addictive nature into our system we get sick and we get drunk or we have the rush we chase after until we get into all kinds of trouble. But of even more importance is that we have this mental obsession, which ensures that even though we don't want to drink and/or use, sooner or later our minds will tell us it's okay to do so. We will put the alcohol or the substance into our system thereby triggering the physical allergy and we will get loaded once again.
Dr. Silkworth, the medical benefactor of Alcoholics Anonymous, in the letter he supplied to AA suggests that the thought processes of the alcoholic mind had to be transformed. His letter goes on to state that this transformation of thought must occur and is essential if an alcoholic is to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. In Bill's story he says, "Simple, but not easy, a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all" - a clear description of the transformation which must occur.
This transformation of thought was difficult for me, even though I understood that it must occur. The difficulty was that I had no understanding of the power and pervasiveness of my human nature and how all-encompassing it is. I felt a lot of fear in attempting to let go of my mind which was propelled by my human instinct as it was all that I had ever known. But it is here, in this time and at this moment, when I want to let go and know I need to let go. It is here in this moment now that I must trust in God so that through His grace the transformation of thought may happen.
Written by Armand
The words "simple but not easy" would indicate that I understand the goal but achieving it requires effort - in this case, suprs-human effort. How do I relinquish my human nature when it is all I have ever known? Isn't it my nature as a human being to be the way I am? Have I been presented with the ultimate conundrum? Trust, as you point out, is the necessary ingredient to move away from myself toward others and then toward The Power That is Within me. In turning to The Light, it has been made possible for me to know that the Light is deep within me but it must be turned on or awakened in order for real transformation to occur. For me, that possibility became achievable only by incorporating all Twelve Steps into my life until they became my life - my way of living. The architecture is outlined for us in The Big Book, the spiritual manual for defeated drinkers. Is to "seize upon it and follow its suggestions," My form can and has been passed from a state of unknowing to a state of knowing. From defiance to reliance. From ignorance and doubt to certainty and trust. Far beyond what I think, this is how I feel. The transformation of loving myself through you and through The Power Within me and within all of us.
ReplyDeleteMichael as you say "time to stop walking around in the lobby eating candy and popcorn and go through the doors and into the show." the ticket to our show as alcoholics is a TRANSFORMATION of thought...Thank You...Armand
DeleteBefore I came to AA I didn't know anything about the mental obsession and physical allergy I just knew I kept drinking over and over. When I came to AA I was told to say the serenity prayer which I memorized and that's all I had to replace the drink at first. I had to reach my rock bottom before the transformation started and the thought of drinking that was paramount to anything else started to go. Once I surrendered and asked for help and started to apply what was given to me the compulsion to drink was removed and is today contingent on the maintenance of my spiritual condition which comes with asking God for help, the application of the steps, helping others and giving it away. Love and service are what Dr. Bob told us about AA and I hope I never forget his words.
ReplyDeleteAnne our thought process can no longer be propelled by our human instinct but rather by the will of God...Thanks so much...Armand
ReplyDeleteA Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
ReplyDeleteArmand,
Thanks so much for touching on a state of being which is so often misunderstood, then tragically twisted into a reformulated metaphorical pilgrimage that will never bring us into the "promised land of sobriety." If I might, I would share the following regarding "the benign little Dr. who loved drunks," Dr. William Duncan Silkworth and whom he believed the "Father of Light" and the "Devine Physician" to be as related and published by Dick B. many years ago.
"Shortly before his death, the author spent an hour with Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, friend of A.A., the Rev. Sam Shoemaker, and Bill Wilson. Dr. Peale told me of the conversations he had with Bill Wilson about Bill's conversion. However, until 1997, I had never heard the following account by Peale about Dr. William Duncan Silkworth. It can be found in Norman Vincent Peale, The Positive Power of Jesus Christ (New York: Foundation for Christian Living, 1980), pp. 60-61. It appears under the title "The Wonderful Story of Charles K.":
Charles, a businessman in Virginia, had become a full-fledged alcoholic; so much so that he had to have help, and fast, for his life was cracking up. He made an appointment with the late Dr. William Duncan Silkworth, one of the nation's greatest experts on alcoholism, who worked in a New York City hospital [the Charles Towns Hospital]. Receiving Charles into his clinic as a patient, the doctor gave him treatment for some days, then called him into his office. "Charles," he said, "I have done everything I can for you. At this moment you are free of your trouble. But there is an area in your brain where you may hold a reservation and that could, in all likelihood, cause you to return to your drinking. I wish that I might reach this place in your consciousness, but alas, I do not have the skill."
"But, doctor," exclaimed Charles, "you are the most skilled physician in this field. When I came to you it was to the greatest. If you cannot heal me, then who can possibly do so?" The doctor hesitated, then said thoughtfully, "There is another Doctor who can complete this healing, but He is very expensive."
"That's all right," cried Charles, "I can get the money. I can pay his fees. I cannot go home until I am healed. Who is this doctor and where is he?"
"Oh, but this Physician is not at all moderate as to expense," persisted Dr. Silkworth. "He wants everything you've got. He wants you, all of you. Then He gives the healing. His price is your entire self." Then he added slowly and impressively, "His name is Jesus Christ and He keeps office in the New Testament and is available whenever you need Him." Dr. Peale then describes the healing of Charles through the power of Jesus Christ."
The 12 Steps of AA is the written testimony of the founders regarding the undeniable saving power of embracing the Gospel and person of Jesus Christ. And this gratefully recovering alcoholic has found all of the above to be absolutely experientially true.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic In a 10th step meeting 25 years ago I raised by hand and shared. While sharing I exclaimed "what is it that God wants of me." As i was sharing the answer came to me "He wants all of me."...Thank you...Armand
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