Thursday, September 22, 2016

The Folly Of Control


The literature of Alcoholics Anonymous says as alcoholics, " Our egomania digs two disastrous pitfalls. Either we insist upon dominating the people we know, or we depend upon them far too much.  If we lean too heavily on people, they will sooner or later fail us, for they are human, too, and cannot possibly meet our incessant demands. In this way our insecurity grows and festers.  When we habitually try to manipulate others to our own willful desires, they revolt, and resist us heavily.  Then we develop hurt feelings, a sense of persecution, and a desire to retaliate.  As we redouble our efforts at control, and continue to fail, our suffering becomes acute and constant.  We have not once sought to be one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society.  Always we tried to struggle to the top of the heap, or to hide underneath it.  This self-centered behavior blocked a partnership relation with any one of those about us.  Of true brotherhood we had small comprehension."
         It is in the letting go of self and trusting in God that allows us to accept others as they are and to relinquish control. One of the greatest gifts from the program of A.A. is to have true and honest relationships with those around us. We can learn how to interact with others through our interaction with God in the Eleventh Step.  We can learn how to love and how to allow ourselves to be loved   We can learn how not to interact with other personalities, which we can like or dislike, but rather to interact with the part of them that is good - the part of them that is God.
       It is in the letting go of self and the trusting in God that allows us to accept others as they are (and ourselves as we are).  This allows us not only to relinquish control but to have no need or desire to control at all.

Written by Armand


Edited by Caitlin Alexandra

2 comments:

  1. The concept of letting go of self in order to co-exist peacefully seems, at first, counter-intuitive. However, peace of mind, as you point out, is derived not from the mind but from the awakened spirit. That is a notion too unthinkable to me without the presence of The Power Within me. Through integrating all Twelve Steps into my life, I had nothing to trust and no one but me. Over time, my personal relationship with The Power Within began to develop, and my need to dominate or depend became increasingly less forceful. I began to understand the folly of control as engineered by the formerly fearful me. Relationships began to shift and substance took the place of emptiness. I began to feel whole. Trust has become the landing place for letting go of me.

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  2. Michael at peace in the will of God there is no thought to alter the experience by imposing our human will. It isre a recovered alcoholic lives...Thank you...Armand

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