After sharing the fifth step with myself and another human being, after exhibiting a sense of humility, after acquiring a clarity of mind and a sense of peace I braced myself for the final piece of the step - to admit to God the exact nature of my wrongs. I met my sponsor outside a small chapel on a day just like any other, I thought ... until he swung open the chapel doors. I looked down the center isle to the alter and became immediately aware of the quietness and state of holiness that existed. I froze and swallowed hard, realizing that the next few moments were going to be as profound as any other in all of my life. In that time, that place, and in that moment I was to seek the forgiveness of God for all I had done wrong in the past. Together, my sponsor and I slowly knelt down and he prayed for us in a way that only he would do. When he was finished I shared the exact nature of my wrongs with God - I had then completed the fifth step.
Since then I have participated in many fifth steps with alcoholics and addicts that I have read the Big Book with. It is altogether a very humbling experience to be a part of - making me feel the utmost of helpful as a human being and supplying a sense of wholeness to lives. Once I did a fifth step with someone and as we were leaving the Church he said, "I know that for centuries people like you have helped people like me do exactly what we did today... but today was the day that I had the opportunity to be a part of it."
Yes, it is a remarkable experience to feel the nearness of God and to share that with another. It is an experience that is not meant to be missed. It is a complete cleansing of the past and, in turn, a receiving of the gift of forgiveness and a clean slate - all built upon a new relationship with God.
Written by Armand
To be fortunate enough to be in a position of such magnitude is a humbling and cleansing experience. To be trusted at this utmost level of human interaction is, without question, a spiritual experience. It is the living proof of my value despite my dark past, and of the equivalent value of the person who has chosen me in whom to trust and share his/her innermost self. For me, that dynamic is only possible when The Power Within me meets The Power Within another in an effort to re-align my life away from my will and towards His Will for me. The integration of all Twelve Steps into my life in such a way that they have become my life is the necessary process that resulted in the unfolding of my spirit in a way that I could understand the deeper notion of my existence. And, therefore, the existence of others. In many ways, when the teacher is ready, the student appears. Part of the miraculous transformation of recovery.
ReplyDeleteMichael an incredible experience for both blessed by the presence of God...Thank you...Armand
DeleteBless you again for sharing your personal experience of that miraculous event I was so blessed to have witnessed. Especially, the all too real feelings of impending doom that precede this most holy conversation. But the floor beneath doesn't drop away, nor do we plunge head first into some fiery pit of self imposed eternal damnation. Remarkably, we are met instead by a tidal wave of limitless Mercy, and Love. We discover that the very God of eternity, the One whom we had cursed, rejected and at times despised has been all the while; patiently, watchfully and yes joyfully waiting in that very place to reunite with His errant child.
ReplyDeleteBefore we utter a word we discover He envelops the humble attitude of our hearts with a Love and Compassion beyond telling. But, like the "Prodigal" written of in Luke 15:11-32 we continue our "confession" anyway, even as waves of forgiveness wash away every remaining vestige of gilt and shame associated with our past. And as we receive Him in our hearts we discover He has already received us in His, as our only Savior, Lord and perpetually Loving Father. In that eternal instant we become, literally... A new creation.
But the encounter isn't finished... It's only just begun, for He imparts to us not only Peace in His presence but an unquenchable desire to encounter Him more completely, and to exercise the power contained in the newly discovered gifts He has bestowed as fully embraced and lovingly cherished members of His eternal family. We discover that the insurmountable wall of mystery that once concealed the "Simple" in the "Program of AA" has been removed, completely swept away by the unseen Hand of the God who created us to experience this very moment and many more yet to be discovered. "Praise be to Him who's mercies endure forever" and thank you Armand, and everyone who has come after, for you're unbending desire, no matter the cost, to become His humble servant and a partaker of His ministry through the 12 Steps of AA that are inarguably grounded in the immutable Word of God and His Holy Spirit that provides the breath of eternal life.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic as an alcoholic partaking in a 5th Step it takes a degree of humility but it does bring a sense of relief. Bill wrote in the 12 and 12 edited by the Jesuit priest Father Dowling that when humility meets serenity a great moment is apt to occur. For me it was the very presence of God in my life for the first time since I was a little boy. Thanks for being there...Armand
ReplyDeleteI think Bill W. helps us through this critical step with a set of prayers before and after our Fifth Step:
ReplyDeleteA Pre-Fifth Step Prayer:
God, please help me to complete my housecleaning by admitting to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs. Please remove any fears I have about this step and show me how completion of it will remove my egotism and fear. Help me to see how this step builds my character through humility, fearlessness and honesty. Direct me to the right person who will keep my confidence and fully understand and approve what I am driving at. Then help me to pocket my pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past so I may complete this step and begin to feel near to you." (72:1, 72:2, 73:0, 74:2, 75:2)
Fifth Step Prayer
Higher Power, Thank you for helping me complete my housecleaning. I can now look the world in the eye. I can be alone at perfect peace and ease. My fears have fallen from me. I have begun to feel your nearness. I have begun to have a spiritual experience. I feel I am on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe. (75:2)
I thank God every day for this program. Doing a Fifth Step with a trusted fellow of AA who follows the process as outlined in the Big Book is the perfect preparation to ask God to remove of character defects in the Sixth Step.
Jim the program of Alcoholics Anonymous as stated in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is the actual and only program of Alcoholics Anonymous...Thank you...Armand
DeleteI have admittedto God, myself and another human being the exact nature of my wrongs. I am trying to get a new relationship with my creator and discover the obstacles in my path. I completed my housecleaning and hopefully will loose my fear and egoism. I am grateful that people are there to guide and help me and listen to my story. I want to be rid of the anger, fear and self-pity and move forward in hope and faith. I am blessed to have been able to listen to others 5th step as I see how my experince can benefit others.
ReplyDeleteJessica abandon your nature and live in the will of God...Thank you...Armand
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ReplyDelete[A Ladder to Above] New comment on Inspiration.
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Kevin O'Connor Unsubscribe
5:08 PM (59 minutes ago)
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Kevin O'Connor has left a new comment on your post "Inspiration":
I like what Jim expressed; his Honesty touched my thoughts. I'm not One speak in Philosophy type terms I can't feel the REAL Thoughts of Indecision. I'm my journey for the Last 45+ Days "Indecision" is huge.As I pass 60 & people Are dying & Life Get "Lifey" I wonder who Really Cares about people & what's my Next Chapter in Life ? It all might sound Crazy but THIS Is where I am No BS. I continue to Go to meetings & am trying to"Snap out of It" I know I need CHANGE & Additional adds to my program. The Funk comes & Go's & I'm looking forward to it Passing to Freedom once again. This why I'm writing it to hopefully Help Release IT Ke
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Posted by Kevin O'Connor to A Ladder to Above at October 20, 2018 at 5:08 PM
Kevin appreciate you sharing your thoughts...Thank you...Armand
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