When I become angry or resentful, it is in that moment that I manifest my human SELF - CENTEREDNESS. In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it says "that we think is the root of our troubles." It also goes on to say "It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise point that we permit these do we squander the hours that might have been worthwhile. But with the alcoholic whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found it fatal! For when harboring such thoughts we cut ourselves off from the sunlight of the spirit."
The solution to our alcoholism is a vital spiritual experience. We must give life to our relationship with God. We accomplish this by turning from our human nature and living in the will of God. We receive God's will through inspiration conditioned by prayer and meditation. We can't possibly be in the will of God when we are manifesting SELF - CENTEREDNESS in our lives , but by sobrogating our human nature to the will of God we cannot possibly manifest the SELF - CENTEREDNESS of our human nature in our behavior
I thought I was all I had. Thus, self centeredness was a natural response to that underlying mistruth. I lived in a self-constructed prison of me. Alcohol was the quick-release complement to my way of living. It wasn't until the roof caved in that I became aware of the threefold devastation of my awful sickness. I was physically, emotionally and spiritually bereft with nowhere to run and noone to turn to. In utter desperation, I found AA and my life was saved. It's important for me to state that the fellowship of AA sustained me and provided quiet hope for recovery. But only by incorporating The Twelve Steps into my daily life have I been able to understand the true nature of my aloneness, and to work towards recovery from that paralysis. As sick as I was, the moment I began to give parts of me away to other suffering alcoholics is the moment my recovery became fully attainable. Today, many years later, i enjoy life in a way previously unknown to me. Through others, I have found The Power Within me which has enabled me to be me. And then to give myself away.
ReplyDeleteMichael a day without alcohol is a step in the right direction so cheers for the fellowship. A day without God is the day that the alcoholic who is not drinking is still suffering from untreated alcoholism...Thank you...Armand
DeleteThe manafestation of fear in our lives creates the self centerness we display in all our actions.
ReplyDeleteFor the alcoholic this is fatal. Fear can motivate us into making the wrong decisions or it will parallize us to do nothing when we should do something. Caught in the grip of indesisiveness
Lies will be told, and many actions of mishandling situations will run amock in our lives. Many find relieve in the use of Alcohol and other substances. In order to recover we must address our self centerness and how fear plays it's part. Am I fearful about not getting what I need. Am I fearful that I will lose what I have.
With these kind of motives we are not accepting the Grace of God in our lives , there is no trust.
No trust in God. In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it asks us, where have I been self seeking, dishonest, and friieghtened ? If we are to get to the root of our self centeredness, we must accept the truth. The truth is that we live in fear. That fear manifested in us will destroy us.
The 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous guides us to another dimmension of life. A life free of fear. No longer are we selfcentered , because we now rely on God's inspiration not our own instincts .
Don the manifestation of our character defects in our behavior alerts us that ourthought process is propelled by our human instinct. As an alcoholic our thought process must be propelled by the will of God if we are to recover. In the will of God only love and peace can be exhibited, never self centeredness...Thanks...Armand
DeleteTo begin, there is no doubt that without giving myself to God my self-centered nature will spread like wildfire through my spiritual landscape and pillage the forces which have healed the scars of psychological warfare and mended relationships reborn. Giving myself to Him is not what my diseased nature wants to do, so I must constantly step over and above the self-conceived barriers in order to knock them down from the other side on which He is on. I hold the grudges and hang on to anger when in those given moments I exist only within the barriers - making it impossible to live under any rule but my own. Letting go of this hold
ReplyDeleteis not the battle, the battle exists within the grip of my human nature, my tendencies, my all-too-well-practiced self-centered ego that tells me I am strong enough to get through on my own. But I am not. I will die if I ever rebuild these barriers which the true program of AA has taught me to destroy through forgiveness, patience, and gratitude but above all love - love pulled from the Almighty and love that is everlasting. I do not wish to live in the pained archive of my past but in the blessing of today.
Caitlin thank you for sharing your experience with both your human nature and your spiritual nature. In as you say "the true program of AA" we find that alcohol is but a symptom of our true problem, our true problem is self centered fear. It is only through the destruction of our ego that we can gain enough humility so that we can unlock the door to the grace of God. Once there we are healed...Thanks again...Armand
DeleteThis comment is from A Grateful Recovery Alcoholic
ReplyDeleteAfter having been brought to my knees by my own best efforts at control any further attempts at self reliance are now pure acts of insanity. And yet, all too frequently pride takes the place of what should be gratitude for His miraculous intervention in my life. Too often I want to be adequate in my own strength and be loved by Him because of my "self-generated" goodness, and be admired by my peers because of my "superior" performance. Pride pollutes everything. It stunts my spiritual growth, hobbles my relationships and causes me to miss His blessings. When I allow pride to reign, life becomes bland, truth becomes relative and values become debased.
Yet He still intercedes and speaks into my heart to shatter the illusion that with my own cleverness and self-generated "inner strength" I can solve life's problems and be a "blessing" to others. Lord forgive me when I look away from you for even an instant to plummet into the raging waves of life as did Peter in the Sea of Galilee when he took his eyes from you. For only when my mind is firmly planted upon Your Word and gloriously sweet Presence will I have the power to face the ambiguities of today with the absolutes of Your truth and guidance.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
A Grateful Recovery Alcoholic Ain't it the truth. Doesn't take much to sidetrack a believer to the way of the world but fortunately the program of Alcoholics Anonymous has supplied Step 11 which asks us to pray and meditate daily which connects us to God and centers us in His will...Thank you so much for you insightful comment...Armand
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