What Was Our Choice To Be?

                            I had admitted I was alcoholic.  I believed in God, yet I drank twice while a member of Alcoholics Anonymous.  Once for thirteen months and once for ninety days.  After the second relapse it was than that I fully realized that I had to choose.  As the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says "when we became alcoholics crushed by a self imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or God is nothing.  God either is or isn't.  WHAT WAS OUR CHOICE TO BE?"
                 Early on I chose that God is everything.  When I made that choice I had no idea of the power of the human instinct, how pervasive it is and how difficult it would be to turn from my nature and to live in the will of God.  The second relapse brought me to a state of reasonableness where I could clearly see that the surrender had to be absolute.  In Bill's Story in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it says "simple but not easy, a price had to be paid.  It meant destruction of self centeredness.  We must turn in all things to the father of light who presides over us all."  Will you?