In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it says "either God
is or he isn't, either God is everything or He is nothing. What is our
choice to be?" When I came to the point in my recovery where I have no
desire to turn back to my old life but I am are fearful of letting go
of my nature and living in the will of God, it is at this precise point
that the above statement has to be answered. I may have answered in
the affirmative earlier in my recovery but it is only now that I fully
understand what is being asked of me , or rather required of me. If I
am to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body, if I am
to be free of manifesting my human defects in my behavior, if I am to
live a life where I am tolerant and loving of all but never accepting of
evil, to live a life free of fear, anxiety and anger, to be respected
and loved, to have a spirit of charity and forgiveness, to know joy not
because everything in my life is as my human nature thinks it ought to
be but because God is with me. Joy is not the absence of sorrow but the
presence of God.
For the first time in my life I
am fully alive as the Spirit is fully awakened within me and I have
become the human being that God created me to be, thereby maximizing my
human potential as I am free of conflict and at peace.
I am aware of what is required of me, and I have answered yes, God is everything.
Intellectually, it is not a difficult question to answer. I know that both my surrender and my acceptance have to be complete in order to live the life I was born to live. It is the powerful presence of my human nature that eventually causes indecision, inner conflict and disturbance to occur. And while the circumstances of my life will always occur on a human level, my desire to live in the Will of God transports me to an evermore powerful level of existence. In the absence of That Power, my absence and fear pervade. In the presence of That Power, my life is salved and fortified and my thoughts are calmly inspired. Money and possessions have never brought me real peace of mind. Only the Spirit Within me has. The Twelve Steps have made that possible.
ReplyDeleteMy choice was made over time - a time in which I spent lingering in the hadal zone - a dangerously dark, lonely, and unchartered abyss where my old life and human nature clung to me and want for a life lived in His will began to bloom. When the desperation to let go freed me from my will and my ways, I came to the surface leaving the dark behind me as the light surrounded and loved me.
ReplyDeleteMaking the decision that God IS and that He is EVERYTHING was the most important crux overcome in my spiritual life - giving me the foundation upon which to stand and build a life free of fear and anxiety, full of love, patience, and forgiveness with HIM at my side. By praying each day that I don't lose my willingness for His way, I stay in the realm of the Spirit - a realm both within me and encompassing all I see and feel - where true self and soul is awakened and capable of so much more than the lost shadow which was my human nature.
Michael the problem and the solution. when my thoughts are propelled by my human instinct, I then manifest my human defect. when my thoughts are propelled by God through inspiration, we manifest love and peace...Thank you Michael....Armand
ReplyDeleteCatlin Thank you for sharing your personal experience.. just love the line "...I came to the surface leaving the dark behind me as the light surrounded and loved me. Here is where we experience life as it was meant to be for us. Forgiving those that offend our human nature and loving that part of everyone that is good, that is God...Great comment...Thanks...Armand
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