Conscious Contact

                        For me, the CONSCIOUS CONTACT is a personal relationship with God in this moment and at this time.  I do not look back in regret and I don't look forward in fear, as through the grace of God in this moment I have relinquished my human nature. My human instincts are no longer propelling my thought process but rather my thought process is propelled by the will of God through inspiration.
               The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says "we may face indecision, we might not be able to determine which course to take.  Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or decision.  We are often surprised how the right answers will come after we have tried this for awhile.  What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.  We find our thinking will be as time passes more and more on the plane of inspiration.  We come to rely upon it."  The dictionary defines inspiration as "the thoughts of God implanted upon the mind and soul of man."  I don't need to run the thoughts of God through my intellect as I instantaneously perceive them as truth.  The question becomes, will I be obedient.  Is my behavior going to be propelled by the will of God or is my behavior going to be propelled by my human instincts.  The back half of the Eleventh Step says "praying only for the knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out" as my human nature will never do the will of God.
                It is here that a recovered alcoholic lives, in the will of God through a CONSCIOUS CONTACT.

The Real Problem

                        Alcoholics Anonymous what a beautiful program.  Not only does it relieve us of our uncontrollable use of alcohol but the program can be applied to each and every problem in our lives.
               I came to A A because I had a desire not to drink alcohol but could not stop drinking it.  Also alcohol was impacting severely on my life, specifically my mind and my body.  I discovered through the program of Alcoholics Anonymous that alcohol of itself was not the problem, that alcohol was but a symptom of the problem.  THE REAL PROBLEM is self centered fear, afraid that I was not going to get what I wanted, afraid that I would lose what I had.
              When any of our human instincts are threatened we overreact but when we make a decision in the Third Step to turn our thoughts and are actions over to the care of God, we are really on our way to a serene and peaceful live.  The integration of the remaining steps into our lives leads us to a place where we are praying and meditating on a daily basis.  Praying only for the knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.  In this moment in the will of God I will not drink and in God's hands all my problems will be solved.  There is a solution to THE REAL PROBLEM , that one is God may you find God now.  In the will of God we do not overreact when we perceive that  our human instincts are threatened as we are trusting in God, safe and serene        
 

Trust The Key Component Of Belief

To believe, we have to trust.  Trust is the key component of belief. When I was a teenager I broke my relationship with God. It was a relationship that had developed through the early religious training I received in Catholic grade school.  The fact that I broke my relationship with God did not change that I always believed in God.  I believed in God even while I was living the life of an addict -- in utter pandemonium. My behaviors had nothing to do with my belief in Him.  It was my lack of trust in Him which led me astray from a relationship with Him for so long. Trust, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, is "assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something". 

To have such certainty for the Supreme Power requires humility, exactly that which the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous give us.  The incorporation of the steps of such a program into our lives begins to break down our egos so that humility (and all the many benefits from it) can seep into our lives. After some time we actually develop a hunger for it.  I have learned in my experience with the program of Alcoholics Anonymous that humility is the key that unlocks the door to the grace of God.  It is only through this grace that we remain sober and recovered from our addictions and the manifestation of our character defects.  Our egos must be deflated and our human desires subrogated to the will of God.  Belief is necessary of course,  but trust is essential.  

TRUST IS THE KEY COMPONENT OF BELIEF.     

Serenity

                             I have committed myself to the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous as I have realized that the program of AA must come first in my life and along with that comes a personal relationship with God that allows me to have the opportunity of SERENITY regardless of what is occurring around me.  Serenity is the absence of conflict in my thoughts
              The Step Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says it so well.   "We are no longer frightened and purposeless.  The moment we catch even a glimpse of God's will, the moment we begin to see truth, justice and love as the eternal things in life we are no longer disturbed by all the seeming evidence to the contrary that surrounds us in purely human affairs.  We know that God lovingly watches over us."
             By integrating the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous into our lives in such a way that they become our life and manifesting the principles of that in our behavior we have the opportunity to have a serene and safe life as joy is not the absence of sorrow but the presence of God and with that comes SERENITY.

Moral Psychology

                            The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous in the chapter The Doctors Opinion features a letter given by Dr. William Silkworth, Medical Director of Townes Hospital in New York City., a renowned hospital in the care of alcoholism.  One of the founders of AA and the primary author of the Big Book Bill W., was under Dr. Silkworths care on three separate occasions.  In this letter he states "we Dr.'s have realized for a long time that some form of  MORAL PSYCHOLOGY was of urgent importance to alcoholics and that unless the alcoholic can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope for recovery."  Dr. Silkworth and his colleagues believed that not only did the thought processes of the mind have to be transformed but the source of what powered the thought processes of the mind had to change.  The American Dictionary defines psychology as the science of the thought processes and behavior.  Further it defines moral as virtuous.  Therefore the thought processes of the mind had to become virtuous.  In order for this to occur, the mind of the alcoholic could no longer be propelled by the human nature or human instinct but rather by the will of God through inspiration.  In the back half of the Eleventh Step we are "praying only for the knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out."
               This is the crux of the solution to our alcoholism, a transformed thought process enabled by the grace of God.   

Forming And Sustaining Relationships

                
                Step Four in the Step Book describes the condition well.  "It is from our twisted relations with family, friends and society at large that many of us have suffered the most.  We have been especially stupid and stubborn about them.  The primary fact that we failed to recognize was our total inability to form a true partnership with another human being."
                I went through my entire life unable to interact with others on an intimate level, incapable of allowing others to experience me as I truly am and unwilling to allow others to share with me their true self.  I would present to the world what I thought the world needed to see in me so I could feel good about myself.  In the past, the relationships I did have were of the type, when I was done taking from them what I wanted and they were done taking from me what they wanted, well then, the relationship was over.  I was incapable of FORMING AND SUSTAINING RELATIONSHIPS in an honest and caring way with other human beings.  The greatest gift I have received from developing a personal relationship with God through the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous is the ability to interact with other human beings at an honest and true level  thereby FORMING AND SUSTAINING RELATIONSHIPS  that are caring and loving.  This occurs for us as we are now able to be the human being God created us to be thereby maximizing our human potential.

To Know Peace

                           In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it says "either God is or he isn't, either God is everything or He is nothing.  What is our choice to be?"  When I came to the point in my recovery where I have no desire to turn back to my old life but I am are fearful of  letting  go of my nature and living in the will of God, it is at this precise point that the above statement has to be answered.   I may have answered in the affirmative earlier in my recovery but it is only now that I fully understand what is being asked of me , or rather required of me.   If I am to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body, if I am to be free of  manifesting my human defects in my behavior, if I am to live a life where I am tolerant and loving of all but never accepting of evil,  to live a life free of fear, anxiety and anger, to be respected and loved, to have a spirit of charity and forgiveness, to know joy not because everything in my life is as my human nature thinks it ought to be but because God is with me.  Joy is not the absence of sorrow but the presence of God.
                 For the first time in my life I am fully alive as the Spirit is fully awakened within me and I have become the human being that God created me to be,  thereby maximizing my human potential as I am free of conflict and at peace.
                I am aware of what is required of me, and I have answered yes, God is everything.

The Resentment Prayer

                                  I found that in compiling my Fourth Step resentment list, the best way to deal with resentment was to pray for and forgive those on my list.  In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous in the chapter How It Works it states "we realize that the people who had wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick.  Though we did not like their symptoms and the way they disturbed us, they like ourselves were sick to.  We ask God to help us grant  them the same tolerance, pity and patience we would grant a sick friend.  When a person offended we said to ourselves, perhaps this is a sick person, how can I be helpful to them.  God save me from being angry, thy will be done.  God will show us how to take a kind and tolerant view of each and everyone."  As we draw closer to God, in most situations this begins to happen automatically.  
                  As an alcoholic we find that resentment is the number one offender to a serene and peaceful life.
If we are to have a state of consciousness that is clear and free of conflict, if we are to lead an alcohol free life, a life where resentment is not causing conflict in our mind and therefore not manifested in our behavior than we must let go of our human resentments and there often is no way possible without the help of God. 

Step Six - Key Questions Step Seven - The Basic Ingrdient

                
                 Having completed Steps One through Five, there are some fundamental recovery questions in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous that must be answered before we can move on.
                                     
                               1) Have we omitted anything?
                               2) Is our work solid so far?
                               3) Are the stones properly in place?
                               4) Have we skipped on the cement put into the foundation? 
                               5) Have we tried to make motor without sand?
If we can answer these questions in the affirmative, then we have completed the first five steps in such a way that we have acquired the humility necessary to be entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
                  The Big Book of AA states "if we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six.  We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable.  Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?  Can God now take them all, every one?  If we can answer in the affirmative we have then completed Step Six.


                 The Seventh Step of Alcoholics Anonymous is "humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."  In the Step Book it states "this lack of anchorage to any permanent values, this blindness to the true purpose of our lives produced another bad result, for just as long as we convinced ourselves that we could live by our own individual strength and intelligence, for just that long was a working faith in a higher power impossible.  This was true even though we believed God existed.  As long as we placed self reliance first a genuine reliance upon a higher power was impossible.  THE BASIC INGREDIENT of all humility, a desire to seek and do God's will was missing."
                 I have learned through experience that belief in God is not enough, that we must trust in God in every area of our lives, even as our every day life unfolds.  The purpose of the program of Alcoholics Anonymous is to bring us from a thought process propelled by our human desires to a thought process propelled by the will of God.  In the will of God our defects that exist in our human nature cannot possibly be manifested in our behavior.  And it is only through true humility, a desire to seek and do God's will, that can occur.  We can free ourselves from the bondage of self, we can trust in God in all things and if so we are protected from the disease of Alcoholism.