There is an old Biblical story which relates to having trust in God. When the Jewish people left Egypt, "The Exodus", God had prepared a land for them - The Promised Land. The Promised Land was an eleven day journey from Egypt. Moses sent a scout from each of the twelve tribes to explore The Promised Land and report back. They reported that the area was magnificent, a land flowing with milk and honey, but the people there are powerful and the cities well fortified. What's more, "we saw giants seven to nine feet tall". This caused fear in the people. The only scouts willing to face their fear (by trusting in God) were Caleb and Joshua, both willing to enter The Promised Land. The Jewish people decided not to enter. For the next forty years the Jews wandered around in the wilderness until all those who were over twenty at the time had died. Once again, they stood at The Promised Land and only Caleb and Joshua who were over twenty from forty years ago were allowed to enter as they had been willing to face their fears by trusting in God.
We each have our own exodus from our own addiction. We became weary of wandering around the wilderness alone. We were ill. We were finished. We face our fears by trusting in God and we enter The Promised Land - a land of serenity, peace and joy. Are you ready? Have you come to believe that a power greater than yourself could restore you to sanity? Have you come to trust in that power?
Written By Armand
Written By Armand
Michael C.
ReplyDeleteTruth is I didn’t really know what was wrong with me. Yes, I was addicted to alcohol but I instinctively knew there was a causal factor. The courage to discover and address the real cause escaped me and kept me wandering dangerously outside of everything meaningful, especially myself. It was only by integrating all Twelve Steps into my life in such a way that they became my life that I was able to reach myself through The Power Within me. Trust came from Within and, thus, there was no longer a reason to wander alcoholically, or otherwise aimlessly, through the garden of my life. The longer I live in Trust, the more irresistible its benefits become. Especially in giving it all away.
Michael the human nature is a powerful foe...Thank you...Armand
DeleteArmand,
ReplyDeleteI also humbly suggest it’s important to review the previous decisions that have brought me to this place. For each and every one relentlessly attacks my false pride and grandiosity. Step 2, had to reflect my final-admission-to-myself that my previous thinking and acting out indeed required a Power greater than myself to restore me to sanity…Meaning, I had to admit to a "mental illness of such a severe nature that a person cannot distinguish fantasy from reality, cannot conduct her/his affairs due to psychosis, or is subject to uncontrollable impulsive behavior.” To the alcoholic, if he or she doesn’t completely agree that they qualify for the first two points of this definition, the last certainly qualifies us.
Step 3, clearly identifies that “ Power” exclusively as the person of God. I had hoped that some theoretical, metaphysical or philosophical or other "terrestrial science” would provide an escape hatch allowing me the option to further occupy the throne. That was not in the cards. It was clear to me that If I rejected the clarion call of the original writers, in any way, I was still embedded in the insanely delusional thinking of a chronically-self-possessed-alcoholic-mind. Even though my God given conscience was seared to a cinder at that time, this realization still struck like a ball pean hammer blow. I had no choice but to begin the process of surrender that Step 3 proclaims and surrender to the following steps that invite God to inhabit the innermost parts of my being.
But, my innermost parts were not a place I desired to go but I realized the festering sore of me had to be opened and drained.. Step 4, reveals my part in this process as acknowledging all the refuse of a lifetime of self indulgence and prayerfully ready it for disposal. In Step 5, I confessed all sinful acts, actions and attitudes in a witnessed confession to God Himself... and received God’s mercy and acceptance as he removed every layer of guilt and shame associated with my faults and failures and confirmed my innermost need and desire to have God continue to remove these defects of character in Steps 5, 6 and 7..
Once this portion of the process was apprehended, I soon discover that I no longer feared the loss of the life once lived. That life, has been cast, into the trash pail of sinful acts and actions forgiven and forgotten by the Creator of all. An inexplicable shift in paradigm has occurred, the animal appetites need no longer be sated, my unbridled fleshly desires loose their allure, the obsession has been removed. In their place grows a consuming desire to drink at the Masters well.
And so I pray: Gracious God, knowledge of You is my principal purpose and passion. It is my greatest need and most urgent desire. I really want to know You... not just as Creator and Sustainer of the universe but as my Father and Friend. I confess that often my immediate lack of knowledge of You is the direct cause of my insecurity, inconsistency, insufficiency and vacillation in my life and in my prayers.
Lord, I commit this day to seeking to know You better, To open my true self to You; I desire to be real, honest and vulnerable with You; I invite You to invade every aspect of my life. Show me Your will and give me the strength and courage to follow Your guidance. Help me to dedicate myself to making the knowledge of You always my first priority. Reveal Your grace and goodness, Your righteousness and power as life on life's terms becomes a joy filled adventure engaged in frequent visits to the mercy seat of the One who refines me in the fire of Your love. It is a miracle, as a new and unspeakably holy freedom is experienced and explored, the old life has passed away, a new life begun.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic Unable to discern fantasy from reality. How true!...Thank you...Armand
ReplyDelete