Today I was reminded of the work of Dr. Tiebout, a pioneering figure in the treatment of alcoholism and early supporter of Alcoholics Anonymous. He concurred that "the characteristics of the so-called typical alcoholic are one who is narcissistic with an egocentric core, dominated by feelings of omnipotence and intent in maintaining, at all costs, their inner integrity." In a careful study of a series of cases regarding the alcoholic by Sillman, Dr. Tiebout reported that Sillman felt he could discern the outlines of a common character structure among problem drinkers and that the best terms he could find to describe said group were, "defiant individuality and grandiosity." Tiebout concurs with Sillman and states, "...inwardly the alcoholic brooks no control from God or man. The alcoholic is and must be the master of their destiny." Tiebout continues, "...granted the more or less constant presence of these character traits, it is easy to see how the person possessing them has difficulty in accepting spirituality and God. Spirituality, by its demand that the individual acknowledge the presence of God, changes the very nature of the alcoholic. So, if the alcoholic can use the spiritual tools of recovery and accept the concept of the presence of a power greater than themselves, then he or she by that very step modifies presently and possibly permanently his or her deepest inner structure and when done so without resentment or struggle then they are no longer typically alcoholic."In my own experience with the disease of alcoholism, the belief in God in and of itself is not enough, as I had always had a belief in God. That belief must also carry with it the component of TRUSTING in God to the point of making a decision to turn my will and my life over to His care. All we have today is contingent upon our relationship with God - in this day and in this moment.
Written By Armand
Yes, I possessed all those primary characteristics of the alcoholic - defiance and grandiosity in the extreme. I hadn't a clue regarding spirituality. And my definition of God was someone else's which I had am impossibly difficult time understanding or accepting. It took the pain of alcohol to bring me to my knees. While there, I located my innermost self when I made the concession of ultimate defeat. That, I learned, was the first step in my recovery. I learned further that in order to access the primary characteristics of the person I was born to be (paradoxical), I would have to follow a path that would eventually lead me to me - through The Power Within me. That path would be lighted at every turn by the integration of all Twelve Steps into my life in such a way that my life would become mine. And yours.
ReplyDeleteMichael loved when you wrote "I located my innermost Self and made the concession of ultimate defeat."...Thank you...Armand
DeleteYes, I lived out that hyper exaggerated and delusional belief in my own importance. Justifying every unrestrained journey into what turned out to be my God given appetites but with an unholy zeal that deliberately left God out of the equation. Thus I became a bottomless layer of gilt and shame terrified by the ever-present fear of having my true self discovered and inner "daemons" exposed. There was... no good in me to be found. To be honest, there was no me at all. Just a self created caricature, a mere bundle of personas alternately exercised to gain the acceptance and ultimate possession of the person, place or thing I craved.
ReplyDeleteYet, the effects of God's presence were everywhere and all about me. In overheard conversations, the random kindness of strangers, witnessed displays of true love and affection, the majestic design of the natural world, a baby's furtive glance. That was the life I craved to fully encounter in fleeting moments of sanity. But I knew it would only came about if I could summon the courage to completely surrender to God and His simple plan. A courage I simply didn't possess. A courage that could only be given by a Divine hand.
Gods gift of faith was finally given as I reached out in desperation and as it drove me to my knees and the Ultimate Author of that vision I finally began to apprehend the radical change encountered in "How it Works." I asked for His protection and care with complete abandon and as I surrendered that wretched life at His feet, all the accumulated gilt and shame of 37 years fled into infinity... And miraculously, in its place, now resides the very Holy Spirit of God. The memory of that first encounter is as fresh in my mind as it was some 35 years ago. Today, I'm strangely thankful I discovered alcohol and the inevitable misery it brings. Without it, I would never have walked through the doors and into the fellowship of AA. I would have never encountered the Steps that lead to the "Peace of God that surpasses all understanding." (Philippians 4:7) I would never have come to know my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. And, my beloved brother, neither would you.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic Surrendered in the will of God we Become the human beings God created us to be...Thank you...Armand
DeleteArmand, For me the pathway to God is the pathway of the Mystic which does not require me to believe in God but to love God as proffered by Jesus in the First Commandment. I think belief is God is a confusing term used by Bill W. and got everyone into the cognitive brain debate about the existence of God. Carl Jung, a mystic, laid out the pathway to the Union with God experience in his January 30,1961 letter to Bill Wilson, "The only right and legitimate way to such an experience is, that it happens to you in reality and it can only happen to you when your on a path, which leads you to a higher understanding. You might be led to that goal by an act of grace or through a personal and honest contact with a friends, or through a higher education of the mind beyond the confines of mere rationalization." This letter in my opinion is probably the most important document in all of AA. According to Carl Jung the prescription for alcoholic is to seek Union with God, It is the unitive experience that heals the alcoholic. All the Best, John. PS. I am not a narcissist so I take exception to Dr. Tiebout's description of the alcoholic.
ReplyDeleteJohn S.
DeleteComment From A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
With all due respect, Obviously, the most important document in all of AA are the 12 Steps themselves and they all point us to God... without them there would be no program. How can anyone love God and yet not believe in the very God of that professed love? It is a mistake to confuse rebellion for ignorance of God’s will. If one has a conscience that hasn’t been seared to a whisper by overindulgence in self, alcohol or drugs it is clearly revealed every moment of every day as we go about our ordinary business. Armand is sharing the very same experience, strength and hope that I was blessed to have shared with him many, many years ago and too many souls to count have received Gods saving grace, That is all that God requires. He alone who takes full responsibility for His simple plan and the miraculous results of that plan are legion.
It matters not whether we've been raised by the deeply religious and have fallen away to become slaves under the weight of our immoral misplaced self-centered appetites; or whether, by an unfortunate dint of birth, we have been raised by ravenous wolves in a cold dark dank cellar. The results will always be the same for any hearer and doer of Gods Good News as outlined in the 12 Steps, who subsequently surrenders their will and their lives over to His care. The Steps, like the Gospel, aren’t written to those who still stubbornly cling to the "seat of authority" on the throne as I once did but to those who are humbly prepared to relinquish it. Jung, who was a pantheist and not a Christian, also wrote: ‘When a member of the Oxford Group comes to me in order to get treatment, I say, 'You are in the Oxford Group; so long as you are there, you settle your affair with the Oxford Group. I can't do it better than Jesus."
All of humanity has residing deep within their souls a vacant chamber that only God can fill. The Twelve Steps of AA, as your personal reading has somewhat uncovered, was not the invention of the founders of this fellowship. The 12 Steps are the testimony of those who followed the precise process proclaimed in the Bible as used before the Big Book was ever written. They taught that If God’s people, and we are all His people, who are called by Him will humble themselves, and pray and seek His face, and turn from their wicked ways, then He will hear them from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land. Only then, will His eyes be open and His ears attentive to the prayers He inspires as He refines our desires into those that match His own. This, is a good thing... The densest and most rebellious of alcoholics, as I once was, first has to admit that we are not our own God and that our very best efforts have brought us to a place, humanly speaking, of no return.. and believe that with God all things are possible.
Have no fear for the plight of those newcomers still locked in rebellion In the 35 years I’ve been given a daily reprieve and involved in this marvelous fellowship of ours, I’ve never seen God fail to completely restore a person who humbly surrenders to His grace, whether it be inside or outside of the “room’s.” What our all too finite minds conceal God richly reveals if only we are willing to receive Him as He is and learn to love one another as He loves each and every one of us as though we were His only precious child.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic.