Thursday, January 10, 2019

An Admission Is Required

Step One in the program of Alcoholics Anonymous requires an admission to our innermost self that we are alcoholic.  As difficult as this is, we see the progression not only in the amount of alcohol we consumed but the negative effects the alcohol was having on our bodies and on our lives. This realization comes after we declare, "I am an alcoholic" (or "I am an addict") and after we had a desire not to drink and not to use.  We had to make an admission that we were powerless over alcohol, over drugs, over our reckless behaviors, and that our lives had indeed become unmanageable.  We drank, used, and behaved the way our disease willed us to and so many of us relapsed time and time again over events and circumstances in our lives. The happenstances of our lives are only excuses as the real reason we lapsed was because we only wanted or had one foot in the  program, and one foot out of the program of Alcoholics Anonymous.

          In Chapter Five of the "Big Book" of Alcoholics Anonymous entitled "How It Works" states, "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program."  We can chose  not to thoroughly follow the path and so we do not completely give ourselves to this simple program as we are so very defiant by nature.  The result of such defiance is relapse (if we are lucky, death if we are not).
          It is true that an admission is required.  It is true that we must admit complete defeat.  It is true that our lives are unmanageable. It is true that we must admit to our innermost self that we are alcoholic, that we are addict, that we are amok with disease.  It is true that we must surrender to the program of AA.  Once we have made all of these admissions we must integrate the program of AA into our lives in such a way that it becomes our life.  Then maybe, just maybe, for the first time in our  existence we will have a life... a real life...a joyful, loved-filled life.

Written By Armand





4 comments:

  1. I had to concede to my innermost self that my problem was far deeper than alcoholism. My problem was me-ism. I had to look deeply into me, as alcohol was merely a symptom of my real problem. In that finally-honest search, I found that I had no respect for myself whatsoever - not in any capacity, not in any manner. Alcohol simply enabled me to co-exist with my daily self-loathing. Step Eleven tells us that "self-searching is the means by which we bring new vision, action and grace to bear upon the dark and negative sides of our nature." Pride says we "dare not pass this way", and fear says we "dare not look." Thus, yes, an admission is required; an act of ego-breaking but spirit-awakening humility. That is the "price that must be paid." A small price it is when measured by the return on the investment of integrating all Twelve Steps into our lives until our lives become the lives we were born to lead. Lives to be lead in the presence of The Power Within us, and the guidance The Power lovingly provides for alcoholics and for all.

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    1. Michael an admission to our innermost selves that we are alcoholic is necessary to take the first step in Alcoholics Anonymous. when we have that awareness to our core we are willing to implement the remaining steps of A.A....Thank you...Armand

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  2. Armand,

    It was my base instinct for survival that compelled the first surrender of a whirlwind tour of dark and unbridled animal appetites to the Father of Eternal Light. As my journey continues the mist's of mystery slowly to dissolve. I have been pulled from the wilderness and placed on a path, a very narrow path, a road less traveled. Yet, for perhaps the first time in my life I am instinctively at peace with the sure knowledge that no matter how fearful the path may at times appear, the ultimate destination is secure. A true Miracle...

    My Guide knows my fears, faults and failures all too well but He also knows the deep desires of my heart that brought me to this place and wishes to make them a living reality. He recalls to my heart the words of Chapter 5, "We asked His protection and care with complete abandon." And I sense I'm about to further plumb the depths and breath of the meaning of "complete abandon", but not out of a sense of desperation, but a conscience act of the will. I drop to my knees and fervently seek the One who has placed me here. Who lovingly reminds me that I have abandoned my desire to become my own worst nightmare and continue to walk in the light of His perfect purpose for which I was created.

    He reminds me "It's a simple program" that I all too often fearfully make complex. He speaks into my heart that "My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness." I need only place my weaknesses, doubts and fears before Him and failure is replaced by forgiveness and fear is replaced by an ever deepening faith. He is my Constant Compass and His Word and Spirit my one true and only source of security in every insecurity, and sanity in this seemingly utterly insane world. To walk with Jesus, to finally gratefully accept the love He so freely gives and share it with another is the greatest gift I've ever received and the truest reason and purpose for my being.

    A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic




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  3. a Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic love when you wrote "instinctively at peace with the sure knowledge that no matter how fearful the path may at times appear, the ultimate destination is secure." You have articulated that superbly. It is the experience of a recovered alcoholic...Thank you...Armand

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