When I become angry or resentful, it is in that moment that I manifest my human SELF-CENTEREDNESS. In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it says "that we think is the root of our troubles." It also goes on to say "It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise point that we permit these do we squander the hours that might have been worthwhile. But with the alcoholic whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found it fatal! For when harboring such thoughts we cut ourselves off from the sunlight of the spirit."
The solution to our alcoholism is a vital spiritual experience. We must give life to our relationship with God. We accomplish this by turning from our human nature and living in the will of God. We receive God's will through inspiration conditioned by prayer and meditation. We can't possibly be in the will of God when we are manifesting SELF - CENTEREDNESS in our lives , but by sobrogating our human nature to the will of God we cannot possibly manifest the SELF - CENTEREDNESS of our human nature in our behavior.
Written by Armand
No question that my self-centeredness was at its peak when I was angry or resentful. Moreover, I was self-centered all the time - in good moments and bad. Therefore, all my moments were squandered. In fact, my life was squandered and I knew it. Alcohol was the immediate solution. It mollified my fear and gave a liquid lift to my false pride and arrogance. Everything led me to resentments. Even my expectations were nothing more than resentments under construction. What a lousy life! In The Big Book program of recovery, I learned that destruction of self-centeredness was absolutely essential to recovering from my hopeless state of mind and body. Yet my will was so pervasive that only the occurrence of a vital spiritual experience could and would not only relieve me of the bondage of self but would deliver me to a new state of consciousness and being. For me, the activator of this transformation would come only in one unequivocal and direct way. I had to incorporate The Twelve Steps into my life in such a way that they would literally become my life. The life I always wanted. Now.
ReplyDeleteMichael as an alcoholic we must surrender our will and live in the will pf God if we are to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body...Thank you...Armand
DeleteArmand,
ReplyDeleteTrue humility simply cannot exist in the mind and heart of a self-centered thinker. Humility, the state of being a God centered being only occurs as we spend time; serious time, in the presence of the Master, prayerfully communing with Him, seeking out His will and guidance in every moment so that our very lives begin to become the essence of his prayer. Consider Jesus' words recorded in Matthew 11:28 - 30, "Come to me all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." It is at this juncture, as we surrender our limited understanding of life on life's terms that we begin to be inspired by the Master, think the Masters thoughts and do the things the Master does as He progressively becomes the only object and destination of our journey.
At first, Gods will appears to be the diametric opposite of my own, always inconvenient and delibertly out of focus... This well hidden self-centered pride pollutes everything. It stunts my spiritual growth, hobbles my relationships and causes me to miss His blessings. When I allow pride to reign, life becomes bland, truth becomes relative and values become debased. And so I pray:
Lord, You only ask that I believe You and are willing to let You change my life and help me to avoid sin and bear unimpeachable testimony to your intervention into my life. forgive me when I look away from you for even an instant and plummet into the all too imaginary raging waves of life as did Peter in the Sea of Galilee when he took his eyes from you. For only when my mind is firmly planted upon Your Word and gloriously sweet Presence will I have the power to face the ambiguities of today with the absolutes of Your truth, guidance, grace and love with all whom you place upon my path.
Lord, keep me mindful of the eight words of God-centered servanthood: Without You, I can't; without me You won't. Think Your thoughts through me, speak Your truth through my words, and enable Your best for others through what You lead me to do.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic alcohol is but a symptom of the problem. The problem is self centered fear. Afraid I am not going to get what I want afraid I am going to lose what I have. The solution is a vital Spiritual solution...Thank you...Armand
ReplyDeleteAlcohol is the end result of old behaviors and moving away from what keeps me recovered, the steps, working with others, meetings, service sponsorship and a spiritual connection with God. Alcohol is a subtle foe. Resentments, justifiable anger and fear are all traps that can wreak havoc in my life if left unattended. The Bug Book tells us when all else fails work with another alcoholic, wise words from those who went before. All of my problems today stem from self centered fear and the only way out is to do what the first 100 tell me to do in the program I’d Alcoholics Anonymius as written in the book Alcoholics Anonymous.
ReplyDeleteSorry for the typos it should be ‘Big Book’ and program “of” Alcoholics Anonymous
ReplyDelete