After sharing the fifth step with myself and another human being, after exhibiting a sense of humility, after acquiring a clarity of mind and a sense of peace I braced myself for the final piece of the step - to admit to God the exact nature of my wrongs. I met my sponsor outside a small chapel on a day just like any other, I thought ... until he swung open the chapel doors. I looked down the center isle to the alter and became immediately aware of the quietness and state of holiness that existed. I froze and swallowed hard, realizing that the next few moments were going to be as profound as any other in all of my life. In that time, that place, and in that moment I was to seek the forgiveness of God for all I had done wrong in the past. Together, my sponsor and I slowly knelt down and he prayed for us in a way that only he would do. When he was finished I shared the exact nature of my wrongs with God - I had then completed the fifth step.Since then I have participated in many fifth steps with alcoholics and addicts that I have read the Big Book with. It is altogether a very humbling experience to be a part of - making me feel the utmost of helpful as a human being and supplying a sense of wholeness to lives. Once I did a fifth step with someone and as we were leaving the Church he said, "I know that for centuries people like you have helped people like me do exactly what we did today... but today was the day that I had the opportunity to be a part of it."
Yes, it is a remarkable experience to feel the nearness of God and to share that with another. It is an experience that is not meant to be missed. It is a complete cleansing of the past and, in turn, a receiving of the gift of forgiveness and a clean slate - all built upon a new relationship with God.
Written by Armand
This is where I completely trust the process. I handle the 5th, 6th and 7th Step exactly the way it was done with me, which also matches the big book. I don't tweak anything or say anything unique. This allows me to participate and allow the process and the Holy Spirit to do the work. These are the most intimate steps in the 12. This is where the relationship between sponsor and sponsee is solidified. The timing and place also need to be "right" for the sponsor. I don't force the moment and it always is perfect.
ReplyDeletejim great experience to participate in such an intimate way...Thank you...Armand
DeleteThis is where I completely trust the process. I handle the 5th, 6th and 7th Step exactly the way it was done with me, which also matches the big book. I don't tweak anything or say anything unique. This allows me to participate and allow the process and the Holy Spirit to do the work. These are the most intimate steps in the 12. This is where the relationship between sponsor and sponsee is solidified. The timing and place also need to be "right" for the sponsor. I don't force the moment and it always is perfect.
ReplyDeleteThis Comment Is From A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic
ReplyDeleteBless you again for sharing your personal experience of that miraculous event I was so blessed to have witnessed. Especially, the all too real feelings of impending doom that precede this most holy conversation. But the floor beneath doesn't drop away, nor do we plunge head first into some fiery pit of self imposed eternal damnation. Remarkably, we are met instead by a tidal wave of limitless Mercy, and Love. We discover that the very God of eternity, the One whom we had cursed, rejected and at times despised has been all the while; patiently, watchfully and yes joyfully waiting in that very place to reunite with His errant child.
Before we utter a word we discover He envelops the humble attitude of our hearts with a Love and Compassion beyond telling. But, like the "Prodigal" written of in Luke 15:11-32 we continue our "confession" anyway, even as waves of forgiveness wash away every remaining vestige of gilt and shame associated with our past. And as we receive Him in our hearts we discover He has already received us in His, as our only Savior, Lord and perpetually Loving Father. In that eternal instant we become, literally... A new creation.
But the encounter isn't finished... It's only just begun, for He imparts to us not only Peace in His presence but an unquenchable desire to encounter Him more completely, and to exercise the power contained in the newly discovered gifts He has bestowed as fully embraced and lovingly cherished members of His eternal family. We discover that the insurmountable wall of mystery that once concealed the "Simple" in the "Program of AA" has been removed, completely swept away by the unseen Hand of the God who created us to experience this very moment and many more yet to be discovered. "Praise be to Him who's mercies endure forever" and thank you Armand, and everyone who has come after, for you're unbending desire, no matter the cost, to become His humble servant and a partaker of His ministry through the 12 Steps of AA that are inarguably grounded in the immutable Word of God and His Holy Spirit that provides the breath of eternal life.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic.
A Gratefully Recovering Alcoholic My gratitude is with you my friend...Thank You...Armand
DeleteI learned long ago that to be whole I had to touch every part of me, including and most importantly, my soul. Only through The Twelve Steps of Recovery and then through The Power Within me, have I been able to be both the giver of The Gift and it's recipient at the same time. That Gift is personified in the interaction between two alcoholic sufferers in The Fifth Step. As you point out, the exchange of souls is awakened and purified in the process. No aspect of the program of recovery is so humbling and enriching as this. In the final analysis, it gives honor to my humanity and vitality to my spirit. The highest state of my innermost self.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteMicheal love when you wrote "honor to my humanity and vitality to my spirit...Thank you...Armand
Delete"I looked down the center isle to the alter and became immediately aware of the quietness and state of holiness that existed. I froze and swallowed hard, realizing that the next few moments were going to be as profound as any other in all of my life. In that time, that place, and in that moment I was to seek the forgiveness of God for all I had done wrong in the past. Together, my sponsor and I slowly knelt down and he prayed for us in a way that only he would do. When he was finished I shared the exact nature of my wrongs with God - I had then completed the fifth step."
ReplyDeleteThis was my memory, just like yours. Sharing with God and a human being as compassionate and loving as one could ever ask for, I completed this step with the Spirit alive within, pushing from within to stretch the walls of my soul, making me feel as full and alive as the Spirit Himself.
I didn't know what to expect of the fifth step as I wanted my fourth step to be perfect and didn't think I had done a good enough job on it and I told my sponsor that that was what I thought. However she had a different idea and said she would come over and take a look. Five hours later I completed the first part of step five and on a second meeting the second part. I felt a physical release of all the blockages that had separated me from the spirit as I read the step work and all those resentments and fears dissipated. I was amazed and my sponsor told me at the bottom of it all was self centered fear. Simple! God made this revelation possible in the midst of two alcoholics. What a gift and something I will never forget.
ReplyDeleteAnne thank you for sharing your experience. An experience that is not meant to be missed...Thanks...Armand
Delete