The chapter on Step Four in "Twelve Steps
and Twelve Traditions" describes our dysfunctional relations well, "But
it is from our twisted relations with family, friends, and
society at large that many of us have suffered the most. We have been
especially stupid and stubborn about them. The primary fact that we
failed to recognize is our total inability to form a true partnership
with another human being."
I went through my
entire life unable to interact with others on an intimate level. I was
incapable of allowing others to experience me as I truly was and I was
unwilling to allow others to share with me their true self. I would
present to the world what I thought the world needed to see about me so I
could feel good about myself. In the past, the relationships I did have
were of the type which, when I was done taking from them what I wanted
and
they were done taking from me what they wanted, the
relationship was over. I was incapable of FORMING AND SUSTAINING
RELATIONSHIPS in an honest and caring way with other human beings.
The
greatest gift I have received from developing a personal relationship
with God through the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous is the ability
to interact with other human beings at an honest and true level -
therefore FORMING AND SUSTAINING RELATIONSHIPS that are caring and
loving. This occurs when we are the human being God
created us to be, thereby maximizing our human potential
I related to others from either on my heels, or on my toes. Either leaning backward or leaning forward. Never with my feet planted firmly on the ground. Wives, children, friends, attractors, detractors, strangers, colleagues, it didn't matter. I either dominated or depended. I had no spirit, therefore, I had no life beyond the facade. I became a drunk with a see-through facade - a pathetic figure with glass in hand. Defective relationships were the cause of nearly all of my immediate woes, including my alcoholism. I had to find out why, or die. AA showed me the way, revealed the true nature of my malady, introduced me to a way of living through and in its Twelve Steps, and opened my spirit to The Power Within me who loved me drunk or sober but wanted me to love me as the result of The Solution. I am a new man today with vital and vibrant relationships, progenitored by a personal relationship with The Power Within me and within all of us. Every day remains a part of a vital spiritual experience. And I used to be doomed.
ReplyDeleteYes. "The Power within me and within all of us" is the basis of harmony, love, joy and peace. When I am "grounded" in that harmonious ray of Light (like the sun shining above the clouds), as in heaven so on earth is a real experience.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThank heavens for patient people, and the grace od God helping us.
ReplyDeleteSpiritual patience is love in action. The source of all love is god...Thank you...Armand Being
Delete