Alcoholics Anonymous, what a ride! Early on I heard "I wouldn't trade my worst day in AA for my best day when I was out there." I was skeptical of these proclamations but the members sincerity could not be questioned as these people were just like me in that we all suffered from an illness, but they no longer had the struggle. More importantly they seemed to be living an enjoyable and fulfilling life. The other obvious characteristics were the openness and giving of not all the members but certainly the vast majority, as they seemed to have found a purpose beyond themselves in Alcoholics Anonymous and needed to disclose of themselves in order to grow in their purpose. Now understand all of the above was difficult for me to accept in that I came from an environment and lifestyle where cynicism and skepticism are king and queen. Certainly the only purpose I had in my life was to satiate my instincts and my own selfish desires.
I learned in Alcoholics Anonymous that alcohol is but a symptom of my true malady. My true malady is self centered fear, afraid that I am not going to get what I want, afraid that I am going to lose what I have. This fear propels us in an effort to satiate our instincts and to provide for our own selfish desires. Integrating the program of Alcoholics Anonymous into our lives in such a way that it becomes our life takes us out of ourselves and in doing so we are given the power to help others. That we become capable of putting others needs before our own is a direct result of the healing that occurs for us and is a miracle. We know that we have found a purpose in our problem by helping others who are just like us to recover from their alcoholism and in so doing we are fulfilling A PURPOSE BEYOND OURSELVES.
I agree that, at first, it was difficult to understand the seeming optimism of AA members. My life, driven by fear, directed only by me, and devoted to selfishness was a mass of negativity. I was living with a three thousand pound weight around my neck and I had exactly no energy. What I most needed was to get out of myself before any healing could begin. The minute I turned to a group of strangers and began to think less about myself is the first time I ever experienced a real purpose. Over time, that purpose has grown and added weight and depth to my formerly unattended soul. This has only occurred through the Twelve Steps of AA.
ReplyDeleteMichael moving away from self to a life of giving to others is a result of the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. Michael you are not a miracle but what has occurred for you is...Great comment...Thanks...Armand
ReplyDeleteThe Word of God says over and over to live by His example. The lesson in learning about Him shows me that He is the greatest Servant to all of humanities needs. He comes not to condemn but to save me. Save me from myself, full of fear, full of defects, full of my evil desires. He came to give me redemption , I needed to turn from my sin and repent , receive His grace , and know that I am forgiven. Faith in a Power Greater than myself. A.A. provided me with a venue to repent, serve, and live a new life, receiving His Grace, Love, and His Power to carry out His Will. For that I am truly grateful. Grateful is defined in Webster's Dictionary as receiving Gods Grace , being gracious, in His presence.
ReplyDeleteDon thank you for the definition of grateful as it certainly provides fresh insight...Thanks...Armand
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